


Legally In Love

by AnonymousGuestU



Category: The 39 Clues - Various Authors
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-02
Updated: 2021-01-02
Packaged: 2021-03-12 15:28:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 8,937
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28512684
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnonymousGuestU/pseuds/AnonymousGuestU
Summary: Could you learn to love someone if you had no other choice? Dan is unexpectedly left to grapple with this question following a series of unanticipated events that led him getting married to Amy's fiancé after she runs away. Newlyweds by law, Ian and Dan have to figure out what to do with their relationship moving forward.
Relationships: Dan Cahill/Ian Kabra
Comments: 1
Kudos: 1





	1. Chapter 1

**In which I write a fanfic for a fandom I genuinely have no memories about save for this one ship. They're not related in this AU, and Dan is in college but back for winter break. Amy and Ian are both in the workforce.**

**The arranged marriage AU literally, literally no one fucking asked for, god rest my soul.**

* * *

He ran up the stairs, unable to reach the top no matter how fast he was going. He was going to be late for class, his professor would hate him, he was shaking, he was tripping, he was-

"Dan," Amy whispered loudly, grabbing his shoulders and pushing him awake. "Get up!"

"Huh? What?" Dan blinked blearily, the adrenaline of treading up never-ending dream stairs running through his veins as he jumped awake.

"I'm running away," Amy announced, perched on the end of her bed.

Dan stared at her in confusion. "Hrmsengh?" He mumbled, mouth stumbling over its words. He opened and closed it a bit, getting his thoughts to become more cohesive.

"Amy… you're an adult. You don't have to run away, you can just… go?"

Surely she was joking around. Either that, or he was transported back in time back when they were 5, even though she still looked like a 20-something. Or, he came to a realization, this was just a dream. That made so much sense.

"This isn't a dream, dumbass," Amy rolled her eyes, sighing as Dan widened his eyes at her.

"Oh yeah? If this isn't a dream, how did you know what I was thinking?"

"I've spent most of my life with you, unfortunately," she sighed, pulling his cheek. "Idiot."

"Ow!" Dan glared, more out of automatic response than genuine pain. "What do you want? I was having very important dreams I want to get back to"

She sighed, hand flying to her face, dragging it back down. Dan felt a sort of self satisfied warmth spread through him, the feeling of comfort in being around someone you know partaking in the same mundane rituals as usual. Maybe he missed Amy more than he thought, she was busy with college and work, and he had been busy with the same.

"Like I said, I'm running away. You know the arranged marriage that our family has because of some long old timey tradition?"

"Yes," Dan nodded, lying.

"Well I thought I was okay with getting married to him, since there's really nothing but social and economic benefits to making the marriage, plus it's not like I have anyone I really want to be with and I dont think I'm against marrying someone who would be in the same boat of doing it for mutual cohabitation but-"

"Amy, you think too much," Dan yawned, having zoned out the moment her words started to pick up speed. "If you don't want it, you don't want it. What are they gonna do about it, marry you harder?"

"God, I hate your stupid face so much. I can't believe we share the same genetic material," Amy laughed, pushing him.

Dan grinned at her tiredly. "Just go. If it makes you more happy to run away, go ahead. I'll take care of anything over here."

"You're the worst," she smiled, climbing off the bed.

"I hate you too," Dan replied, pulling his blanket over his head and hearing the window close. Wow, she was taking the whole running away thing seriously.

Dan woke up the next day at the bright early time of 11 AM, walking downstairs to eat breakfast after he took a shower to stop feeling like a sweaty ape wearing human clothes.

"Amy ran away," his mother informed him, hanging up the call that she was on. Looking at her husband, she sighed, "I knew we should have pushed harder for an amendment in the legislature, there was no way Amy was okay with it even if she pretended she was."

Her husband nodded at her, sipping coffee. "Its too late now, dear. Today's the wedding."

"Well it's not like you're going to find her," Dan interrupted. Amy was too through for anyone to ever find her if she put her mind to disappearing. He thought for a second, and then panicked. "You cant get married without being there, right?"

What if it was all for naught and they signed the papers anyway and she got married despite not even being there?!

"No, I don't think that's possible," his mother replied, assuaging his worries. "But if she truly doesn't want to get married, this isn't the best solution. They'll just announce an engagement and then wait for her to reappear. I don't want to force my only daughter to go into hiding for the rest of her life because of a mistake ancestors she doesn't even know of did."

They all fall silent, the sound of kids playing outside floating in through the open window. Regardless of what was happening, the day was moving on and life would go forward.

_"I'll take care of everything here,"_ Dan recalled himself saying. He hummed thoughtfully, wondering what he should do as he grabbed some cereal from the pantry and returned to the dining table.

It was a given that Amy was always the responsible one between them two. He never had to do much because of it, knowing that where he failed Amy would exceed. He knew that she was forced to grow up faster than he did, that she was rarely selfish and because of it he was made up of all the things she couldn't have for herself. With all she did for him throughout his 21 years of life, was it so hard for him to repay her? Maybe not in words, but in action.

"Why don't I get married to them?" He asked, and the room went still.

As the silence dragged on, Dan asked them again. "You need someone to get married to them, right? Why don't I do it?"

His parents looked at each other doubtfully, and in a flash of self awareness Dan hoped that it was because they didn't want to marry off their son, rather than them not trusting him with responsibility. He backtracked, feeling guilty for suspecting his family like that, and then guilty again for making the fact that it was a possibility even an option.

"I can do it. I don't mind." He reassured, pouring his milk onto his cereal. Normally he would be kicking and screaming if someone else asked him to, but he was doing this out of his own volition dammit! Let him help!

"Aren't you straight?" His father inquired. "Amy was engaged to a man, you know. They're not going to let you marry the daughter just because Amy flaked out."

"Never thought about it," Dan replied honestly, because in all of his years of living he never seriously considered the thought of getting into a relationship besides in 6th grade when all of his friends were and he felt like he needed to as well in order to keep up with his peers. After that fell apart, he didn't really think about it, and his immature act probably pushed away anyone who thought he was attractive.

"It shouldn't really matter, considering the other party would be in the same boat," his mother mused. "You can get divorced the moment you start regretting it, okay Dan?"

He nodded, belatedly noting that with the conversation taking so long, his cereal was soggy.

"Well, get ready. We have a wedding to go to." His dad announced, closing the newspaper he was been reading and getting up from the table.

Dan's stomach growled loudly, and his mom laughed, tension dissipated.

"Maybe in a couple minutes," she smiled.

3 hours later, he was meeting his to-be-husband for the first time.

They started at each other, several feet apart. Dan could feel the man assessing him, judging him. It made his skin crawl uncomfortably, giving him flashbacks to the way other students would look at him sometimes. He forced his head clear.

He stuck out his hand, "Hey, I'm Dan Cahill, nice to meet you."

The man looked down at his hand, and after a moment of hesitance where he looked over to his mother smiling icily, took Dan's hand and shook it firmly.

"Ian Kabra, pleasure to meet you" he said sarcastically, the low baritone being the first that Dan had ever heard him speak.

Swallowing down the flash of resentment that had appeared when Ian had hesitated to take his hand, Dan smiled and dropped the handshake.

Their parents were discussing in the corner Ian's mother clearly aggravated. Dan watched in rapt attention as his mother, smiling, shot her down with ease, walking off towards him before the other woman could even reply. His father, on the other hand, was deep in discussion with Ian's father.

"Dan, you're going to have to get changed before the wedding. It's a civil ceremony, but you can't get married wearing that." She told him, nodding to Ian. "There's going to be some random people, is that okay?"

"I don't mind," Dan replied, feeling Ian's eyes on him. "Where do I get changed?" He asked, shrugging off his Letterman jacket and holding it in one arm. He noticed that Ian was already formally dressed, and wondered if that was why he had been staring.

"We're going to a tailor to make you a suit," Ian's mother replied, glaring at his mother, who blissfully ignored her. "We had a wedding dress prepared, but it's not going to be used now, is it?"

"Unless you want me to wear a wedding dress, no," Dan replied instantly, realizing it was a backhanded insult towards Amy.

Ian coughed lightly, getting their attention. "I'll take him to the tailor. Mother, please finish the final preparations for the wedding, we only have a few hours left."

"Of course," Ian's mother replied stiffly, to sing one last contemptuous look at the two Cahills before walking off.

"Follow me," Ian ordered him, and Dan narrowed his eyes at the commanding tone. He fell into step beside him, not letting Ian take the lead.

Ian waited till they were in the car before talking. Dan made himself comfortable in the limousine's silk seats, and watched as a window to the driver's seat slid open so Ian could tell the chauffeur where to go.

"You know, when the Cahills said that the marriage was still going through, I thought that they meant Amy was found. Not this," he jerked his chin towards Dan.

Dan frowned, he knew something was off about the guy but didn't know what because Ian kept his mouth shut around his parents. "What's it matter to you? All you needed was the name anyway,"

"Hmph," Ian replied, crossing his arms and staying quiet for the rest of the drive.

At the tailors, Ian listed off a bunch of terms that Dan didn't know existed, and the moment they had a suit he was bundled back into the car to wherever the Kabra's decided to hold the ceremony.

It was quick. Too quick, Dan would almost say, remembering. How he had repeated what Ian said in front of the judge as (probably paid) guests clapped politely as they signed the papers. They stood besides each other as people congratulated them, and then afterwards they were each given a key and dropped off at an empty but furnished one-story house.

Ian opened the door, bowing at the waist as he beckoned Dan inside, "We're home, dear," He sneered once they were in the living room.

Dan glared at the man who was currently slipping off the tie from the tuxedo he just wore to their wedding.

"Listen, can you stop being an asshole? Amy ran away because she didn't want to get married to a stranger, even an idiot could realize that."

"She doesn't have the liberty of running away, look at what she's ruined! And now you're married to me in her place, I suppose that was an intelligent oversight on your part." Ian spat back, tossing the satin tie to the side and shrugging off the jacket to hang it up.

It wasn't. Dan was prepared, had been prepared. But he was second guessing himself. He recalled what his mother had told him before.

"Don't be ridiculous, it's only on paper-" Dan rolled his eyes, still standing stiffly in his own traditional tuxedo, refusing to take it off.

"That's all political marriages are." Ian interrupted, waving his hands carelessly.

"-we can just get divorced once it blows over." Dan shot him a dirty look, continuing without caring for the interruption.

Ian gasped, looking at Dan in shock, as if he were an animal for even suggesting it. "I _refuse_ to become a divorcee," he crowed snobbishly. "Can you imagine what would happen to my reputation?"

Dan started blankly at him, eyes widening in disbelief. Reputation?! Was he serious?

Dan grit his teeth and resisted the urge to swing his fists at him. He clenched his fists at his side and took a step forward, eyes flashing. "Then what do you agree to, fuckface? You wanna stay married to me? Then stay married to me!"

Ian crossed his arms stubbornly, matching Dan in stepping forward until they were only a foot apart. "Fine! You think you can solve this by just pushing the problem away and not confronting it? Don't be a child, I'll stay married to you if I have to."

"Don't call me a child, at least I know that Amy deserves a loving relationship that people shouldn't interfere with! You're not some kind of benevolent god for staying married to me, I can do that too!" Dan replied hotly.

Ian groaned, pulling a satirical pouty face while fluttering his eyelashes "Ohhh look at me, I'm so cool for knowing true love trumps all, oooh I'll get flowers for you during our lovey-dovey honeymoon."

Dan stiffened, he was the one supposed to be making fun of others! "I'd be surprised if you put that much effort into it, you seem like the type of privileged ass who leaves everything up to others and just stands around and looks posh."

Ian dropped the ridiculous act, stepping closer than Dan was comfortable with (well, his comfortable radius around an asshole like Ian would be about a mile anyway), but he sure wouldn't back down. "Don't you dare discredit me for my hard work, I know for a fact that I'd be a better husband than you ever would."

"Yeah, because husbands are rated by their credentials. Did you get a degree in chivalry as well, pretty boy?" Dan scoffed, imagining all the trophies and certificates he probably displayed at his old home.

"More than you would ever get, I'd be surprised if someone married you in their own right, let alone stay with you," Ian bristled, looking Dan up and down critically.

"Guess what you did, loser," Dan stuck his tongue out, raising one hand to pull his lower eyelid down while his other went to his hip. He knew it was childish. He felt childish.

"Not out of my own volition, it was to free my sister so she could have the relationship she wanted." Ian muttered, tapping his fingers on his arm.

"That's exactly what I did, yet you make fun of me?" Dan exclaimed, raising both arms in incredulity.

Ian frowned, looking at Dan with unadulterated anger. "Because you looked for an easy way out! I steeled myself to marrying someone regardless of personal feelings, you didn't."

Dan simmered in rage. This prick thought he did this without thinking! He knew the importance of his actions! "I'm just as responsible as you are! You want marriage, I'll give you marriage! Don't go crying to your sister by the end of this"

"I could say the same to you," Ian spat back, turning around and walking away, leaving an enraged Dan behind.

Dan clenched his fists in anger, taking deep breaths before sitting down heavily on the couch that was in the room. Noticing the TV mounted on the wall, he looked around for a remote. Locating it on a shelf, he scrolled aimlessly through channels, avoiding anything romantic till he stumbled across a nature documentary channel. Interested, he began watching the penguins on screen with rapt attention.

Time passed, and he eventually heard someone calling for him.

"Dan. Dan!" Ian called loudly from the doorway. "God, are you deaf?"

"Huh? No!" Dan blinked, tearing his eyes from the screen. His anger had long dissipated, but he felt a flash of white hot anger upon seeing his husband after their argument. Their first fight as newlyweds, he thought sarcastically. "What is it?"

Looking up, he saw that Ian had already changed out of his tuxedo into a less formal suit. Dan couldn't understand why he didn't just opt for some jeans.

"Since we've agreed to try and make this work-" Ian started.

Dan blinked, then snorted. "Oh, was that the conclusion of the argument? I must have missed that part."

"Since we've agreed to try and make this work-" Ian repeated, ignoring him. "Let's talk about how this'll work."

Knowing that Ian had gotten changed made Dan remember how he was still in the tuxedo, so he held a hand to interrupt Ian. "Fine. But first, let me get changed. Where's the bathroom?"

"About that..." Ian glanced to the side, "It's inside the bedroom, at the end of the hallway, but you don't have any clothes. This house was made to accommodate Amy and I when we got married, so the clothes are made for us."

"That's fine, just lend me one of your outfits. We're both guys, and I can live with a strangely fitting outfit for a night," Dan stood up, stretching. He guessed that they were just going to bypass the fight from earlier. That was fine by him. "When is my stuff coming in, anyway? I'm supposed to live here from now on, right?"

"By tomorrow," Ian nodded. "Come to the dining area after you're done."

Dan walked past him, waving his hand in dismissal. "Don't tell me what to do."

Once in the hallway, he opened the door to the right to find the bedroom. Opening one dresser, he found it filled with dresses, probably tailored to fit Amy. He closed it with vengeance and pulled open the other dresser, grabbing a shirt and pants. As he stepped back into the hallway, he peered at Ian, who was on the phone.

"Oh, I don't have my phone," Dan remembered regretfully, getting into the bathroom. He took one look at the shower and its complex knobs before turning on the faucet to the bathtub instead. Once in the welcoming embrace of the warm water, he thought about what was happening. He's married, in a new house, and all with a stranger that he didn't really like.

He felt his mind slipping into depths he didn't want to think about, the marriage registration papers floated up to his conscience, unbidden. He was someone who values freedom, and here he was in an arranged marriage. Would he ever be able to experience love? What was love, anyway?

He stayed in the bathtub till the water turned cold and his fingers pruned. Eventually deciding that getting out would be better than staying with his own thoughts, he pulled himself out of the water.

Putting on Ian's clothes, he noted with distaste that they were too big on him. Post-puberty and he was still small for his age, Dan thought to himself as he rolled up the cuffs of the pants so they wouldn't drag. Drying his hair on the towel, he walked back into the living room, where Ian was at the table, laptop open.

"Our maid is coming in tomorrow along with everything else," Ian told him, and Dan choked on the idea of having a main where there were only two people in a one bedroom house.

Ian looked up and down at him, eyes resting on the rolled up cuffs and the way the shirt sagged on him, and snorted.

"And you're telling me this because?" Dan inquired, face flushing in embarrassment. He sat down across him, glaring.

"We have no food in the house," Ian motioned to the kitchen in front of them. "We either eat out or order something, I refuse to make decisions on an empty stomach."

"Let's not eat out," Dan sighed, choosing to ignore how selfishly the statement was phrased. He looked at the clock, realizing that it was nearly 12. "It's pretty late, just order pizza."

"Alright," Ian replied, and Dan gave a low whistle in approval.

"Look at you! Pizza isn't too refined for your palette, master?" He grinned, resting his chin on his hand as he leaned across the table.

"Shut up, I'm calling the pizza place," Ian hissed in reply.

Dan rolled his eyes and dropped quiet. They ordered a simple pizza with pepperoni. Dan wouldn't have it any other way.

"Everyone can enjoy a good pizza," Ian replied belatedly, when the pizza was all done and they had thrown away the box.

"Amen," Dan said, full and content. "So what did you want to discuss?"

"Sleeping areas. As you may have noted, the guest bedroom was changed into an office. One of us has to sleep somewhere else till we can get two beds. After that, we can either go on a honeymoon now or in a week."

"In a week sounds better, I need to get used to being here." Dan decided to answer the second point first, "as for sleeping areas, what, are you flaking out already? I thought married couples sleep in the same bed, my dear husband."

Ian sighed, long and loud. "Why did I know you were going to say something like that? Whatever, you've taken a bath so sharing a bed should be fine."

"What do you mean, should be fine?!" Dan yelled at Ian as he made his way to the bedroom.

Dan turned away as Ian got out sleeping garments for the two of them, wondering if they were going to change in front of each other. Sure, he had changed in front of guys in gym lockers before but was this really like that? As if answering his question, Ian went to the bathroom, leaving Dan to quickly pull off his oversized shirt for a equally oversized pajamas. They stood on either side of the bed, staring at each other.

"Who's going to turn off the lights?" Dan asked, raising the blankets in order to emphasize that he wasn't.

Ian held up a little remote and climbed in, clicking the lights off. Dan stood there, in the dark, holding the blanket up. He grumbled, climbing in, and he swore he heard Ian laughing at him.

He had shared a bed with people before, this wasn't much different. In fact, compared to sleeping next to strangers when he booked rooms for conventions in order to save money, this was infinitely better.

A soft bed with ample space, and a person who wasn't likely to run off with his stuff or stab him in his sleep. Hell, Ian wasn't even as bad as some of his dorm mates back at the college. He was an awful person, but considering that Dan was stuck with him and morally obligated to make it work, it wasn't the worst. Feeling the warmth emanating from Ian's side of the bed, Dan turned towards him.

He turned towards Ian, as if he was a grade schooler at the sleepover.

"Hey, are you awake?" He whispered.

Ian turned away from him.

"Hey. I have an older sister, I know when you're awake and pretending to be asleep to ignore people." He whispered again, louder.

"What is it?" Ian bit out, whispering harshly back.

Dan fell quiet. Why had he bothered the older man? If he were to guess, he'd say it was because it was so late at night, and having someone else be awake in close proximity prompted him to ask questions that could only be said after being up for so long, like late night calls with friends, but in this case it was a stranger he could only learn more about

"Did you want to get married to Amy?" Dan finally said, noticing how Ian went still.

"Are you really planning on me spilling my life's story to you? You can't be that optimistic, or that stupid," Ian turned around, his golden eyes striking in the darkness.

"You really can't stop being a jerk for even one second, can you?" Dan shot back. "Come on, _darling_ , if we want this to work we have to start somewhere. Trust is a two-way bridge, or something."

"Trust is a two-way street," Ian corrected.

"Same difference. Bottom line is, I'm going to be annoying and you're going to be an asshole, so we might as well understand each other more while we're at it."

"So you're self aware of your own annoyingness…"

"I do it just for you."

"I can feel the love, trust me."

"Answer the question, bastard."

"Yeah I wanted to marry her." Ian finally admitted, after a brief gap where Dan thought he had fallen asleep. "We met a couple times, I thought she was nice. We were both doing it for our families, I figured if there was someone to understand me, it'd be her."

"Wow that was way more than I was expecting, If you have daddy issues, go to a therapist, not me." Dan joked, trying to ease the gravity of what was just said.

"Aren't you supposed to be my emotional support, husband dear?" Ian rolled his eyes. "What about you, aren't you straight?"

"No idea," Dan replied, repeating the answer he said to his dad earlier. "I did it for Amy."

"I did it for Natalie."

It was a peaceful conclusion to their earlier conflict, the resolution passing between them unsaid.

They fell quiet, a strange limbo between tense and comfortable. Facing each other on the same bed with distance between them, Dan wondered if he could ever get used to it. His life with Ian would be his new normal until one of them gave up and inevitably broke the marriage, he just wondered how long he'd have to wait till then. A stranger that he had no choice but to get to know.

"Any other questions?" Ian asked, yawning.

Dan felt himself yawn as well upon seeing it. "Not right now, but I am surprised you were able to reply so civilly to someone as uncouth as me."

"Comes with the degree in chivalry."

"I doubt the credibility in your credentials…" Dan trailed off, feeling sleep overtake him.

He heard Ian reply something, but was too far gone to decipher it.


	2. Chapter 2

**I realized that I made them a little too OOC and more in line with Haru and Daisuke from The Millionaire Detective (which makes sense, since I'm also writing for that fandom and they're similar to this ship) but I've since then reminded myself that Ian is an asshole and I'll try to keep that in mind moving forward.**

**Otherwise I'm going to sum up OOCness because they're adults now.**

* * *

Dan woke up in bed alone. It felt normal, besides the fact that the room was unfamiliar and he didn't wake up to an alarm. He felt comfortable, sinking into the sheets like soft clouds of decadence.

He could hear water running, and recalled with unnerved detachment how he had gotten married the other day. It didn't feel concrete. It didn't feel real. He felt like he was walking through a dreamy haze of reality, untouched by everything that was happening around him.

In other words, he dozed off back to sleep. Startling awake at the sound of the door opening, he noticed Ian walk in wearing a bathrobe. The dark haired man glanced over to the bed, where Dan hurriedly closed his eyes and pretended to sleep.

Peeking with one eye, he watched Ian slowly open the wardrobe and untie his bathrobe. He shut his eyes quickly and turned over, feeling Ian looking at him at the sudden movement.

Why was he hiding? Why was he looking? The uncomfortable intimacy of sharing a living space with someone he didn't know, just like when he was dorming in college, felt all the more pressing.

"Has anyone ever told you that you suck at pretending to be asleep?" Ian said suddenly, and Dan couldn't help jumping at the sound.

Blushing, he turned around to glare at Ian, who was buttoning up a dress shirt. "Well excuse me for giving you some privacy, my dear husband."

"Wow, it speaks! I didn't know animals had a concept of privacy." Ian replied scathingly, turning to the mirror to fix his tie.

"You!" Dan sat up quickly, moving off the bed. He felt his foot catch on the cuff of the now unrolled pajama pants, and yelled out upon realizing what was happening. "Oh fu-"

He felt his arms shoot out to brace himself for the fall, clenching his teeth as the impact with the floor shot pain through his whole body.

"Owwwww," he muttered, opening his eyes warily. He looked up to see Ian looming over him, eyes glittering with humor.

"Being on the floor is a good look on you," he snickered.

"Am I interrupting something?" A new voice asked in the doorway.

Dan got to his feet and brushed off his clothes, ignoring Ian to look at the newcomer. A woman around her mid thirties held a spatula in her hand and earbuds in her ears, her hair mainly brown save for a few red streaks.

She looked like a scene kid who never grew out of it, but Dan would never say it aloud.

"Hello?" He said instead, stepping towards her and stumbling forward as his foot caught again.

"This is Nellie, our maid," Ian announced. "She'll be in charge of our cooking and cleaning, obviously."

"Hey Nellie!" Dan beamed, walking up to her after repositioning his pants. "Nice to meet you, I'm Dan!"

Nellie smiled at him, big and warm, and Dan couldn't help but feel like he'd get along with her. Her eyes turned cold as she turned to Ian, who leveled her with a cool stare.

"Breakfast is ready," she relayed monotonously, walking out without a reply.

Dan hurried behind her, Ian choosing to stay in the room to finish something.

"He's a lot better than the pretentious brat he was when he was a teen, but change doesn't come that easy," Nellie gossiped to Dan the moment they were out of hearing range.

Dan understood that, he was glad that he was at least out of high school before getting married. Sure, people could do it, but he couldn't imagine his teenage self being able to deal with as he could now.

Admittedly, he still wasn't handling it all that maturely, so it really showed that what Nellie was saying was true for him too.

"Nellie, have you ever been in love?" He asked, thinking of all the high school marriages he had seen with his old classmates. He knew that statistically, they tended to fall apart, but the sentiment was still there. If marriage wasn't done for love, what was it done for?

"I have! I've been married for about 8 years now, and I still love my idiot husband," Nellie replied, her face softening at the thought of her husband.

Dan watched, entranced. Would that have ever happened to him?

"How did you know?" He asked instead, sitting across her at the dining table and marveling at the delicious breakfast spread.

"I just knew! It was a feeling, and the marriage was just a natural step. Not everyone wants to get married because they don't feel like they need to relive their love, and that's okay. But I don't think marriage is about proving what your love exists, it's about proving that you can continue loving them from then onwards."

Dan, understandably, zoned out of her monologue the moment he heard that "It was just a feeling". He was all about feeling emotions in the moment, he'd probably understand once it happened to him. Either way, Nellie's passionate spiel went right out the other ear.

"Are you guys planning on eating or will you just chat at the table all day?" Ian cut in, taking a seat besides Dan and across Nellie.

He was pretty sure he didn't love Ian though, Dan nodded to himself.

"Nellie here does cooking and cleaning bi-weekly, and meal prep for the rest of the week when she's not here," Ian explained as they started eating.

Dan would have mused more on the concept of waking up in an unfamiliar house eating unfamiliar food with unfamiliar people, but he was simple when it came to food. If it was good, he could shut off his brain for a while.

"I'm surprised you didn't just hire her to live with us," Dan muttered, glancing at Ian taking a small bite out of his croissant.

"She will be, the moment we move into our real house." Ian replied, sipping his coffee.

"Our real house…?" Dan repeated, confused. "Isn't this where we're going to live?"

Ian looked at him, scandalized. "Surely you can't expect me to stay in this hut for longer than it takes to prepare for our honeymoon? This is temporary, I can barely stand the fact that it's as small as a hotel room."

Dan shared a conspiratorial glance with Nellie, and then frowned in realization. "So when I asked about taking a week to get used to here, what did you think I meant?"

Ian shrugged. "I don't know, poor people's preparations?"

"You're literally the worst," Dan informed him, viciously biting into a slice of toast.

"Might as well invest in a marriage counselor while you're at it," Nellie snickered, popping a macaron into her mouth and standing up as both of them turned to glare at her.

"I'll be cleaning with my music on, so don't call me," she informed them, picking up the empty dishes and humming along with the mp3 player that she turned up the volume on.

Dan cringed as he heard the sound playing from where he sat, and turned to look at Ian typing away indifferently at a materialized laptop.

"If we're not living here, let's just get the honeymoon out of the way and go now. After the honeymoon, we go to the real house right? I'll just need to have a couple of my stuff and the rest can be sent there," Dan stuck his hand in front of the screen, Ian slapping it away immediately.

"Your items are in the living room. I have to say, the minimalist living of people without money is quite impressive."

"Thanks dear," Dan said sarcastically, walking over to the boxes after he spied them in the corner of his eye.

Indeed, all of his stuff, both from his room back at home as his dorm back at the college, were packed neatly into boxes. Funny how little space a baseball card collection takes when you don't have them stacked haphazardly on a shelf. Dan dragged his finger along the ridges, sighing in contentment knowing they were there.

"I want to play video gaaaaaaames," he lamented aloud, thinking back to the consoles he had at home. His old home? His mom and dad's home. But his father liked them too much to give away, and he was still saving up for his own.

"Childish," Ian coughed in the background.

"You're just an old man who has a stick up his ass, don't take it out on me because you don't know how to have fun," Dan stuck his tongue out, and Ian rolled his eyes in response.

"Sorry I can't play with you, I have actual work to get back to," Ian headed towards the bedroom.

Dan groaned at the thought of doing work, he'd much rather do whatever he wanted without worrying about money or time. Opening the next box to try and find his laptop, he searched through the items with renewed vigor.

Finally, after what seemed like hours, he had successfully located his phone, his laptop, his chargers- essentially what he took in his suitcase to college.

He also located a set of his own clothes. Taking care not to trip, he made his way to the guest bathroom, opening it to see Nellie wiping the mirrors while humming along to what sounded like a top 40s hit.

Huh. She seemed more like an indie artist person, but who was Dan to judge someone for how they looked?

He tapped her shoulder, shocking her into flinging a dirty rag into his face.

"Oh gosh, don't scare me like that!" She yelled, pulling an earbud out and picking the dirty rag gingerly off his face.

"Noted," Dan said, wiping the dampness off with the sleeve of the shirt he was wearing.

"Do you need to take a shower?" She nodded towards the set of clothes in his hands, and then glanced down at the rolled up pants.

Dan felt his face heat up in embarrassment. "I need to wear my own clothes," he explained lamely.

"Riiiight," Nellie squinted. "Give me a couple minutes to finish cleaning the bathroom. Actually, why don't you just take a shower in the other bathroom? I already cleaned it."

"Yeah, sure," Dan mumbled, shuffling out the door.

He sighed, opening the bedroom door. The bed was neatly made, and Ian was opening various drawers.

"What are you doing?" Dan asked, hovering awkwardly near the door.

"Taking inventory," Ian responded automatically. "I have to get rid of these dresses efficiently by tonight."

Ian turned to him, and glanced at the clothes draped over his arm. "You're getting changed? Pity, you looked good in my clothes."

Dan felt his mouth dry at the words, his eyes scrunching up in wary confusion. This was bait, he knew it. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"With how small you are, wearing oversized clothes perfectly fits your childish image," Ian snickered, walking up close to look down on him.

"Don't act so cocky just because you have a couple inches on me," Dan huffed, turning away and slamming the bathroom door behind him.

Getting into the shower, he fiddled with the knobs while squeezing himself against the wall to avoid direct connection to the water till he got a reasonable temperature. Baby steps.

Once in his own clothes, he took his towel to dry his hair, and then hid Ian's towel under the sink. Payback for the short joke.

"Your fashion sense is horrible," Ian commented as he walked out.

Dan looked down at his faded jeans and Pokémon print t-shirt, and frowned. "It's called nostalgia."

"That's a big word, I'm surprised you know what it means," Ian replied. He was looking down at his phone, and Dan had a visceral sense to just knock it out of his hands like a cat.

He didn't, but he did sit on the bed and think about it for a while.

Ian frowned at his phone and clicked his tongue, and Dan smiled at the idea that something wasn't working out for him. Yeah he was petty, what of it?

"I can't get a private jet," Ian complained, mostly to himself, but Dan was happy to provide commentary.

"Damn, you couldn't check your privilege even if you tried," he said, tapping the bed besides him when Ian looked up. "What are you looking at?"

Ian sat next to him, and Dan regretted motioning him over for a second. It was different from sleeping on a giant bed away from each other, where the only indication that someone else is in the bed with you is the slight dip where they lay and the creeping heat resonating from their body.

He wondered if it was bothering Ian as well, and the thought of being annoying trumped his initial discomfort.

Dan leant over to peer at the phone. He saw listings for airplane seats, and ogled at the number of zeros next to them.

"-First class, obviously. Do you want to add anything?" Ian finished, and Dan realized that he was so zoned out about sitting down that he hadn't been paying attention.

This was fine, he'd been bullshitting public speaking for all his life. "Can we get it separately?"

Ian gave him an odd look, which quickly turned into annoyance. Dan scored himself one point.

"No, because we are on our honeymoon and to all the places we're going to, very in love."

"Gross," Dan said instantly, and Ian sighed. "Stop sighing at me, we're acquaintances at best and enemies at worse."

"Enemies, you're so dramatic," Ian snorted, tilting his head in amusement.

Dan felt his ears go hot, leaning away. He didn't think about what he said while he was saying it, but he couldn't deny that it was a little stupid to say. Dammit though, Ian wasn't allowed to laugh at him! "I mean-"

"You told your professors that you'll be taking some time off for your honeymoon, right?" Ian interrupted.

"What?" Dan replied, befuddled.

"Our honeymoon… is a week long… your winter break… ends in 2 days…" Ian said slowly, pausing between each phrase in an exaggerated manner. "How bad with time awareness could you be?"

"You're about to find out, husband of mine," Dan snarled back defensively. "I was busy, okay? I'm not sure if you're aware, but I just got married yesterday."

"And what a mess that's turning out to be…" Ian grumbled. "Is there anywhere you want to go? I'm going to plan everything in Abu Dhabi otherwise, the Etihad Residence doesn't look bad…."

"Anywhere?" Dan echoed, eyes shining.

Ian looked up with trepidation. "Anywhere… within reason. I can't take you to the moon."

"Can… can we go to Disney World?" Dan whispered, leaning close to Ian, boundaries forgotten.

Ian leaned away, hands moving back to stabilize himself from falling off the bed. "Disney World? The one in Florida?"

"Yeah!" Dan pumped his fist excitedly. He had only gone once before, and he remembered loving it. If he had the option to go again, he'd take it.

"You want our honeymoon, the week that we're supposed to spend getting to know each other, to be spent in America, in Disney World," Ian repeated.

"Yeah…?" Dan said again, less excitedly. He noticed how far over he was leaning and pulled himself back, feeling his excitement wither away at the leveled response Ian gave.

Was it so bad to want to enjoy himself while on his honeymoon? Plus, it wasn't like he wanted to get to know Ian better, so wasn't enjoying themselves the only thing they could do?

Ian opened his mouth and closed it without saying anything several times. He looked at his phone, and then back at Dan again.

"Tokyo or Hong Kong?" He asked, finally.

"Huh?"

"I don't want to spend our honeymoon in America, but we can always go to another Disney Theme Park. We can just stop in Abu Dhabi for a day or two and then go to a place with one. Tokyo or Hong Kong?"

"Uh… Tokyo," Dan decided, thinking of ninjas. He felt his excitement bubble up again at the thought of going to Japan, a smile blooming on his face.

"Should I start packing?" He asked Ian excitedly, turning to see the other with a complex emotion on his face. "What is it?

"I'm married to a child parading as an adult," Ian said in reply, and Dan felt his excitement deflate like a balloon.

"Stop raining on my parade, at least I'm looking forward to it."

Ian stood up quickly. "I already booked the tickets. You don't have to pack, everything will be given to us there. Or we can just buy it there."

"You can just buy it," Dan corrected.

"We're married," Ian replied dryly. "Much to my chagrin."

"Stuff it," Dan said, standing up and stretching. Despite the fact that they were insulting each other, it felt strangely civil. "By the way, what soap do you buy? It smells really good and I wanted to buy some."

"It's probably out of your price range" Ian smirked, and Dan never wanted to punch a man so badly.

"Just shut up," Dan picked up his forgotten towel from the bed. "You must practice being this annoying, I can't imagine someone naturally being this much of a jerk."

"A supplementary lesson for when I got the chivalry degree," Ian replied. "Don't forget to email your professors."

"I hate emails…" Dan muttered under his breath.

"You hate everything relating to adulthood," Ian replied, "Who knows why you decided to get married."

Dan gasped, affronted. "It was for love! Are you telling me you don't love me, darling?"

"I'm telling you you wouldn't know love if it grabbed you by the face and kissed you till you turned blue."

"Yeah? Well-" Dan faltered, and the proud smirk Ian gave him made him puff his cheeks in anger. He felt himself rise to the challenge subconsciously, tone becoming a little bit harsher "I bet I know love better than you!"

"You probably never even had a relationship till now," Ian laughed sardonically.

"So what if I haven't?! There's more to life than love. There's food and games and friends," Dan listed, counting off his fingers.

"You can't really compare those types of things to a loving relationship," Ian frowned.

"Who's the romantic now?" Dan tossed back, referencing their first argument. He felt something shift in the room, the conversation was heavier than before. "Friendships are built on trust! What do you want from this anyway?"

"I…" Ian started. "It is too early for this, I need to get to work."

"Too early for what?!" Dan complained, the tension in the room thick. "I'm going to be on my laptop, don't bother me."

He didn't even know what was wrong. One second they were discussing trips, and the next Ian was getting hung up on the idea of love? They didn't even like each other.

And Dan was okay with that. As long as neither of them got too close, as long as they were just far apart enough to touch the paper that held them together, everything would be fine.

He walked out of the room with pain in his chest and a stinging in his eyes. Nellie was outside the door, looking somber. Swallowing past the lump in his throat, Dan grinned awkwardly.

"Newlyweds arguing, huh?" He coughed.

"You guys need to talk properly, letting misunderstandings stagnate breeds resentment," Nellie said.

Dan shuffled from foot to foot. It wasn't that bad, right? Everything would go back to this new normal, where they disliked each other's guts but had to stay in close proximity.

"I'm going home for tonight, make sure to talk to him." Nellie warned.

"I will," Dan whispered in reply.

Dan thought to his classmates, the ones who saw his class clown act as immaturity and wouldn't hold eye contact with him, whispering about him behind his back. He thought about his friends from high school, who would have fun with him but never do anything beyond that.

He thought about their conversation from the previous night. "Might as well understand each other," he had said. He guessed he'd have to try a little harder.

Opening his laptop, Dan typed in his password and lost himself to the mundane act of typing emails with too many exclamation points.

"Good morning/afternoon/evening Mr./Ms./Mrs. [Blank]

I hope you're enjoying your winter break! I'm sending this email to inform you that I may miss a couple classes coming back from break as I have just gotten married and will be on my honeymoon!

Thanks,

Dan Cahill"

Dan peered at his last name. Had that changed? He closed his eyes and tried to remember the wedding papers. As they floated back to his mind's eye, he went back to fix all the emails he just scheduled.

"Dan Kabra-Cahill"

Dan blinked at the name. "Dan Kabra…" he mouthed to himself, feeling his chest twist. He didn't think he was attached to his last name, but thinking about it changing to Ian's felt weird. Maybe it was because they had just fought (again).

He glanced at the time and yawned. He managed to get a bit of work done, and he did send out all those emails. He rummaged around in the fridge and made a sandwich, eating at the table alone. He entertained the thought of bringing something to Ian for a single second before swallowing it, along with whatever confused emotions stemmed from it, down with the rest of his sandwich. After finding the dishwasher and putting a lone dish inside it, he made his way to the living room.

Locating his ninja pajamas inside another box, he took a shower and got changed in the guest bathroom. He made his way to the bedroom and opened the door slowly. Seeing no one inside, he tossed himself onto the bed and buried his face into the pillows

He felt himself ease into the bedding, each tense muscle slowly melting into the blanket as he took deep breaths. The sound of water running informed him that Ian was taking a shower, and he felt himself doze off waiting for him.

The door slammed open, and he jerked awake. He blinked away the sleep to stare at Ian, wet haired and dripping with his bathrobe loosely tied around him.

"Did you hide my fucking towel?" Ian growled, pushing his wet hair out of his face. His amber eyes flashed in anger.

"NO!" Dan yelled in reply, and then immediately stopped and laughed. "Wait no, yeah I did,"

"You absolute-"

"I thought it would be funny!" Dan giggled, watching him. "I'll get it for you, don't get your knickers into a twist."

"Your sense of humor is baffling," Ian spat, flicking water at him.

Dan moved out of the path of the water droplets and blew a raspberry. Walking past Ian into the bathroom, he made sure to give him a wide berth. The steam wafting from his hair and the rest of the bathroom smelled clean and like the soap that he wanted to buy, and Dan felt himself consciously hold his breath as he retrieved the towel.

Tossing it at Ian's face, Dan smiled at his disgruntled expression. "I'm going to bed."

"Don't wait up for me!" Ian said in a sarcastic, high pitched voice.

"Never even crossed my mind", Dan turned away, hearing the bathroom door close behind him.

In bed, facing the wall away from the bathroom door, Dan waited. The bathroom door opened and closed, and the lights clicked off. He felt the bed shift as Ian climbed in, and turned to face him.

"Are you going to try and bond emotionally with me again?" Ian asked, and Dan could feel him rolling his eyes in the darkness.

"I would sell you to Satan for a corn chip," Dan responded, after a few seconds of silence.

"Wow, you think of me so highly." Ian said back. "What do you want?"

"We're going on our honeymoon tomorrow. Neither of us are required to get along, but this entire marriage will probably be easier if we didn't hate each other." Dan said, slowly and clearly.

"I do hate you," Ian agreed.

"The feeling is mutual," Dan shot back.

"It's all couple oriented anyway," Ian described the honeymoon. "We have no choice but to get along."

"There's always a choice," Dan replied instinctively. "We just have to agree not to fight."

"Why are you more emotionally mature when the lights are off…" Ian sighed, pulling the blanket towards himself.

"You're just less of a jerk when you can't see people." Dan said, in lieu of an explanation.

"My reactions are an automatic response to seeing your face," Ian said. "Anyway, I'm not expecting to become your best friend after this honeymoon, but it'll probably help with the entire 'trying to get along' bit."

Dan shrugged. "Good enough. I'm still going to say whatever I want, someone needs to insult your massive ego to keep it in check."

"Did you just shrug in the dark? The fact that you can function with a negative IQ is astounding." Ian paused, and then looked him in the eyes.

In the dim light of the room, turned towards each other on a bed but far apart enough to not touch, Dan felt uncomfortable, but not enough to turn away.

"Insults are fair game but if something happens we'll just… try to be reasonable," Ian summarized. "One of us is an adult, it should be easy."

"I'm 21 and turning 22!" Dan said indignantly. "I've been an adult for a while!"

"With how tall you are, you probably still get the kids menu at restaurants."

"Shut up and go to sleep," Dan grumbled, turning away. "Don't we have an airport to go to tomorrow?"

"You remembered! Congratulations." Ian gasped, and Dan felt the bed shift as he turned to face the other way. "We have a ride, I'll tell you when it's time."

Dan hummed in agreement, closing his eyes and willing sleep to take him. It was easy, and his heart felt a little bit lighter.


End file.
